Thursday, 15 June 2017

The final weigh in...

This is it guys.
The end.

or the beginning...
but it's the end of my ability to blame the baby for cravings and fast food sprees.. lolol

My final weigh in, I'm actually quite impressed with it!
With a record weight earning in the beginning of my pregnancy, I got myself under control and was able to stay under my goal of 200 pounds. like just barely... but I did it!

My final weigh in is 190 pounds respectively.
and I'm quite pleased with that.

Now mind you, the emotions have been rolling all around about it.
I mean, I feel HEAVY, I can't breathe, I can't walk, I look at my face in the mirror and see all the puffs and chins, its hard enough growing a baby but the amount your body changes while growing is scary..
I have 60 extra pounds on, I have acne, skin darkening, dry patches, stretch marks (yeah two more showed up on my stomach dang it, I know that's still mild but I was being optimistic lol), aches, pains, changes you don't even want to know about!
Some of them will go away but a lot of them are here to stay. Its only normal that you would feel down about it at least mildly down, off and on throughout your pregnancy. Everyone acts like you should be thankful and joyous 24/7 but the truth is you're not.
I am my own human outside of the baby making and this time period is hard, it is a sacrifice, and its ok to feel that weight burden. (HA. pun of weight vs physical weeeeeeeeight)
So the other day I was feeling it hard, I was hating my appearance and cranky about the pain and then I got an update about this story..
I don't know her personally but have some connections to her family and their story just makes me bawl.. These stories break me down, bad, don't even ask me about the poor women who just passed after welcoming twins.. story here, she also wrote a blog here.
so although I'm entitled to my sorrow, pregnancy is hard, body changing is hard, I own that.
and there are nasty people out there who make you feel worse, I don't know whether they do it on purpose or if they are wired a different way and actually think its acceptable to judge others, or worse don't even notice that they're so hateful/hurtful..
don't even get me started about the media vs pregnant women....
I try not to wallow in my self pity for too long.
Its pointless and wasteful.
I have my health and I'm about to have 2 adorable kiddies.
*I will never stop preaching about how women don't get enough credit for bringing these lives into the world. Seriously, godly miracle, science-y miracle, whatever way you cut it, it's a crazy miracle.
so cut yourself some slack!
Gyming may be hard, it may never be what it once was for me but its gonna happen and I'm determined to drop at least half of the weigh gained..
that's an appropriate goal, right?!
because that's my goal. hahaha

Other than that I am SO ready for this to be done, but I am SO starting to realize how real it is.
My hands have been sweating ALL DAY.
like not just a little sweating, they're like dropping tears of sweat!
kidding, but seriously clammy. LOL
I can talk my mind into forgetting about what's about to happen but my palms speak the truth.
I feel 100% like this Eminem song...
Let's please pray for no vomit on my sweater tomorrow!
I'm not allowed to eat from now on so I'm hopeful there will be nothing to come up, but I hadn't eaten while in labour with Elliott and some how I was sick for what felt like eternity.
Ok enough shop talk.
I will try to update Instagram stories as much as possible tomorrow so follow along there if you are interested!
and I will see you with my newest blog assistant soon! XOXO

those lips! ^ LOL

He always says baby 'in dere' and points to his belly. ^

The last ice cream..
Ice cream will 100% still be on the menu, I will just try to prioritize it into a healthy moderation, LOL.

1 comment :

  1. Good luck and all the very best wishes babe!! xoxoxoox